“Don’t just write ‘hi’ or ‘hey!’” Jaime Bronstein, LCSW, a licensed therapist and author of MAN*ifesting, tells mbg. “You want the person to know that you’re interested, and writing one or two words will be perceived as if you don’t care and have zero investment in actually making a connection. If you want a response, you need to put some effort into your opening line.”
Below are some suggestions for great Tinder opening lines—just be sure to tweak them to be more relevant to the person you’re writing to, and written in your voice to make them more personable.
Best Tinder opening lines:
“What’s one thing I should know before asking you out?”
Kevin Carr, relationship expert and cast member of the VH1 television show Caught in the Act: Unfaithful, says you want to do three things with your opening line:
- Capture the immediate attention of the person you matched with.
- Show a glimpse of your personality.
- Elicit a favorable response.
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This line achieves all three goals by showing that you’re thoughtful, you want to learn more about your match, and you plan to take them on a date.
“What made you so into traveling?”
Sub out “traveling” for whatever is on their profile. If you’re uncomfortable using a pre-drafted first message, you’re on the right track—opening lines are always more successful when they’re personalized. That’s why Bronstein suggests asking a question about their profile: “You want to give the person something to respond to. You can ask a question about a particular picture or something they wrote in their profile.” For example, if someone mentions they love traveling, ask what they love about it or where they want to travel next.
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“You are a QT, and I love quality time. How’s your day going?”
“I always recommend being genuine, real, and sincere,” Bronstein says. “Give someone a compliment. Who doesn’t like compliments? If they’re interested, they will respond by thanking you and then will compliment you.” This is a playful remark that still gets your point across.
“You should be proud of your smile. I’d love to know more about what makes you tick.”
Carr echoes the effectiveness of compliments and recommends following it up by stating your intention. This line is a unique way to tell someone they have a nice smile but doesn’t stop there. It makes clear that you’re not just interested in how your match looks and would like to get to know them as well.
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“Your profile is refreshing. I look forward to learning more about you.”
It’s flattering to hear that essentially, you’re different from the rest. Even the best dating apps can get monotonous with so many people saying similar things. So, if you come across a particularly interesting bio and someone who looks to have put extra effort into their profile, let them know it’s appreciated.
“What’s the most important attribute you look for in a potential partner?”
This let’s your match know right out of the gate that you’re looking to establish meaningful connection. It saves them the guesswork of trying to figure out what you’re looking for. It also shows that what they want is important to you.
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“What beach is that in your profile photo?”
Adapt this one depending on what photos your match actually has on their profile, but as Bronstein notes, getting specific about something in a person’s profile is a great way to make them feel like you’re actually interested in them, specifically. This method can be especially useful if you match with someone with no bio. With almost no information about the person, you can ask where they were in a vacation photo or how long they’ve had the pup featured in a picture with them. As Bronstein notes, “Even though there’s not much to work with, you can always find something to ask a question about!”
“When do you feel happiest?”
We love to talk about ourselves. Anytime you can ask a question that gives someone this opportunity, it helps move the conversation along. You don’t want the exchange to feel like an interview, however. Follow up with statements and observations that allow the conversation to flow naturally.
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“What’s been the best part of your day?”
If you’re lucky, they’ll say matching with you. At the very least this opener gives them something to think about and demonstrates genuine interest.
“Tell me about the last time you fell in love.”
Nothing gets the butterflies going like talking about the L-word. This opening line helps you come across as a serious contender. It can also demonstrate emotional intelligence, as those who lack it aren’t interested in conversations about feelings.
“I believe in love at first swipe. What about you?”
Sometimes a more lighthearted opening line is perfect to get someone’s attention. Maybe they believe in it too, or maybe they don’t. Maybe the line simply makes your match smile. Either way, you’ve given them an opening to engage.
“I’m never sure what to say here but wanted you to know I’m interested in getting to know you.”
It’s honest. It’s vulnerable. It’s direct. Often, that’s all it takes.
Funny Tinder opening lines:
“Are you a fan of shriveled fruit? Not me, but want to go on a ‘date’?”
People who make us laugh are fun to be around. Telling a corny joke is a great way to get someone to let their guard down. It instantly shows that you don’t take yourself too seriously and takes some pressure off the interaction.
“You look familiar. Did we go to the same college? I could’ve sworn we had chemistry together.”
Get it? Chemistry? Coming through with a funny icebreaker that’s also clever can help you seem charming and witty, both admirable traits.
“Roses are red, violets are blue. You look like you could be my future boo.”
There are many ways to wax poetic, but none more disarming than doing so with a touch of humor. This is a cute line to make your match blush without going over the top with creative expression. Plus, it subtly implies that you’re not just on the app wasting time but looking for a special someone.
“If people ask how we met, what should we tell them?”
As mainstream as dating apps have become in recent years, some are still a bit self-conscious about using them. Or rather, self-conscious about other people knowing they use dating apps. Have fun coming up with a more traditional first meeting story. May the best grocery store, gym, or coffee shop win.
“If we hit it off, let’s say it was fate that we met sitting next to each other on an airplane.”
Here’s a ready-made alternative meeting story that you can present to your match. The idea of fate is romantic, while the airplane adds a sense of adventure. At the very least, the two of you can laugh about the suggestion and agree to tell everyone the truth.
“Which do you like better: Hawaiian or BBQ Chicken Pizza?”
It’s such a random question that it’s humorous. When you first match with someone, light and easy-going dialogue can work in your favor. This is especially true with a person who’s on the fence about you. Try to develop a rapport and delve into heavier topics once you sense they’re enjoying the exchange.
“You can delete the app now, you’ve found me.”
The implication that your match has found their person, even in jest, is intriguing. Also, confidence is attractive.
“More than 75 million profiles and we matched with each other. That’s some kind of sign, right?”
Shedding light on the vastness of the Tinder community and the odds of a successful match is comical in itself. It lends credence to the idea that maybe it’s not a reach to consider the connection a more profound sign.
“Do you hate it here as much as I do?”
For many, dating apps seem like a necessary evil. They don’t particularly enjoy the process but participate because that’s the direction dating has trended. Between catfishing, a lack of responses, and general insincerity, things can get really old, really fast. So, open with this line and bond over mutual disdain for our new normal.
“Yes, I’ll go out with you.”
Being presumptuous can actually be charming when you’re joking. Plus, it cuts to the chase and lets your match know you’re interested in a real-life date. Just read the room with this, and all the other opening lines here. If the person doesn’t demonstrate even a slight sense of humor on their profile, you may want to ease into these types of comments.
Best Tinder opening lines for hookups.
“I’m just here to have fun. Are you interested in a casual connection?”
Carr stresses the importance of transparency here. “If you’re just looking for casual fun or a hookup, be open about what you’re looking for.” Use specific wording in your message that clearly communicates this to make sure the two of you are on the same page. (You should also try to make sure you’re picking the right dating app for what you’re looking for.)
“Are you competitive? Whose bed is comfier? Want to find out?”
Bronstein recommends this line for a more engaging approach. It’s funny while delivering the message that you’re not looking for anything serious, without explicitly saying so. This less-direct method works best in tandem with stating your intentions on your profile. If someone takes the time to read it and still matches with you, you’re less likely to offend them when leading with hookup innuendo.
“It’s cold. Want to come over and keep me warm?”
This icebreaker is cute, sexy, and suggestive. The flirty approach may render your desired result. Just make sure you pull it out during an appropriate season.
“I just got a new dog. Want to come over and pet it?”
Notice how most of these lines involve an invitation to come to your place? This puts the ball in your match’s court to accept the invite and take it to the next level, or not.
“My place or yours?”
Switch it up. Maybe they’re not comfortable coming to your place but wouldn’t mind you coming to theirs.
“I swiped right because I find you very attractive, and you seem like a lot of fun. I think we’d have a great time together.”
Even if OK with a hookup, your match might still wish to be courted a bit. Don’t forget about compliments and tact here. Tell the person why you like them, so they know you’re not simply swiping right on everyone.
“Any Netflix shows you’d like to binge watch together?”
Sitting on the couch watching and discussing television together is lowkey, yet intimate. If that’s what you’re looking for, opening with this line conveys your intent.
“I may not be Mr./Ms. Right, but I can be Mr./Ms. Right Now.”
This remark makes it clear that you’re not looking for anything serious. Yet, when teetering the line between serious and crass, it carries a fun tone.
Unique Tinder opening lines:
“What’s your favorite thing about life right now?”
Unique lines are “lines that make you stand out,” according to Carr. Swiping through endless profiles and trying to spark engaging conversation with multiple people can grow exhausting. This is why your match may not respond to every single message. Try to say something they haven’t heard before. Preferably something like this that invests into gaining deeper understanding of who they are.
“If you could teleport anywhere in the world, where would you go?”
The key with a unique opening line is that it makes the person think, because they can’t give the standard responses they’ve gotten used to. You’re likely to learn more about your match through the destination they choose here because there’s a reason behind it—for example, maybe they’d teleport to another state to spend the day with a loved one they haven’t seen in a while.
(For a little more inspo, here’s our list of the best thought-provoking questions to ask in any situation.)
“I won’t say I’m glad you’re single, but I’m happy you’re here.”
This message is sweet, without being sappy. It gets your conversation off to a feel-good start.
“I was skeptical about using Tinder. Stumbling upon you is helping ease my reservations.”
Everyone wants to feel special. Lines like this are almost guaranteed to make your match gush. Only use it if you’re sincere.
“What’s something people often get wrong about you?”
Most of us have felt misunderstood. So, your match will appreciate you looking to understand them from the jump.
“What’s your superpower?”
This one hits on a few key points we’ve discussed. It’s a question, which compels a response; it’s an attention grabber; and it can also be considered a compliment. You’re assuming they’re really good at something. Best of all, it’s thought-provoking and likely will require them to send you a unique response rather than the boilerplate ones they’re used to writing up.
The takeaway.
If you’re ever drawing a blank on what to say on a dating app to start a conversation, try one of the lines above to get the ball rolling. “The truth is that if someone is interested in you, they will write back to you even if your first line is, ‘the sky is blue’,” Bronstein says. “Have the confidence to reach out first. Try to have no attachment to the outcome and understand that dating, especially on the apps, is a numbers game. The more you put yourself out there, the better your chance of making a match.” This goes for women too, who aren’t known for making the first move on Tinder.
Also, remember that not all dating apps are created equal. What works on Tinder may not be as successful on more relationship-oriented dating apps like Hinge or eharmony. When in doubt, focus on being authentic and focus on trying to connect with each potential match as an individual.
Source by www.mindbodygreen.com
